You just posted bond to have your loved one bailed out of jail. It was your money; part of your retirement, your emergency money, money you didn’t want to spend—except love won out. Your money was a nonrefundable fee for the bond. You may have also put up significant collateral, like your house, to guarantee the bail bond if your loved one decides to skip bail.
Now that you have laid it all on the line, how can you be sure they won’t break your heart and jump bail? Well, you know them better than we do. What have they done in the past? Have they broken your trust before? Without the proper understanding of what’s before them they might think that jumping bail is an option. Here is how you help them—and yourself.
1. Get them a good lawyer.
A good defense attorney will help them understand their charge and what can be done to have the charge dismissed or at least reduced in severity. Their attorney will be able to give them hope. They can also discuss with them how jumping bail would ruin their life and hurt the ones who love them—you. When your loved one has a good defense attorney, they feel more involved with their future.
2. Keep them busy.
An idle mind and body begins to manufacture its own stress. Your loved one begins to fear the worst and may contemplate ridiculous ways to escape their predicament. Put them to work on anything that would help their attorney with the case—or have them paint your house. If they have a job, make sure they make it to work. Sit down with them and make sure that their spare money goes to you for repayment on your bond deposit.
3. Become their main source of transportation.
Assuming your loved one is part of your household; keep them on a short leash. Not that they are in grade school, but it keeps you close to them and doesn’t give them a means of heading out of town. They may complain that they feel like they are in jail. Remind them that they are in jail; it’s just a better one than you bailed them out of. And their jailer actually loves them—and has better food.
4. Track their phone.
If you both have smart phones, tell them for your peace of mind that you want to install a locator app on their phone so you can see where they are at all times. Explain that this would help reduce your stress during this trying ordeal. If they push back hard on this one, you may want to start being concerned.
5. Call your bondsman.
If you see certain signs that your loved one may be preparing to bolt, such as a drastic change in mood, elevated agitation, and less involvement with the attorney regarding their case, you may want to call your bondsman and pull the trigger on your best protection against your loved one skipping bail. Your bondsman, acting in the interest of everyone involved, can revoke the bond and your loved one would be sent back to jail.
This is a difficult step. Your loved one may feel unloved and abandoned. You need to remind yourself that you didn’t do this to keep from losing money. You did it so your loved one wouldn’t lose their life by having to live forever on the run.